Investigation Reveals 99% of New Memecoins Are Just Old Memes With '$' Added
A groundbreaking study by the Institute of Advanced Memetics has revealed what we all secretly suspected: your favorite new memecoin is just that reaction gif your aunt shared on Facebook in 2016, but with a dollar sign slapped on it.
Lead researcher Dr. 420_69_PhD, whose credentials include "watching every YouTube video ever" and "being there when DOGE was just a puppy," conducted an extensive analysis of 42,069 new token launches, only to discover that originality in crypto is about as rare as a successful long position in your portfolio.
"Look at this," explained Dr. 420, pulling up a chart that looked suspiciously like the 'This Is Fine' dog wearing a Solana hat. "We've tracked the evolution from ancient MySpace memes to current tokens. $KEYBOARD_CAT just raised 5000 SOL in presale. The cat doesn't even play piano anymore – it's just a 'deflationary yield farm' now."
The study identified several disturbing trends:
- "Bad Luck Brian" has spawned 37 different tokens, each claiming to be "the one that finally turns his luck around"
- Someone tokenized the "I Can Has Cheezburger" cat and called it a "feline financial revolution"
- "Hide The Pain Harold" now manages a DeFi protocol
But perhaps most shocking was the discovery of a sophisticated bot network automatically converting every trending Twitter screenshot into a smart contract. "It's gotten so bad," one developer admitted, "I sneezed on stream yesterday and someone already launched $ACHOO with a 1000 SOL market cap."
The research team also uncovered a secret Discord server where "token creators" (two teenagers and a particularly ambitious hamster) were caught using a random number generator combined with Know Your Meme's archive to launch 30 tokens per minute. Their most successful creation? $RANDOMBS, which ironically became a legitimate governance token for their operation.
One anonymous developer defended the practice: "Listen, why spend time thinking of new ideas when we can just add 'Inu' to literally anything? I just launched $XZIBIT_INU – it's a token that lets you put tokens in your tokens. Yo dawg."
The crypto community responded to these findings with characteristic sophistication: by immediately launching $STUDY_INU, $RESEARCH_PEPE, and $INVESTIGATION_WOJAK, each promising to "revolutionize the way we think about recycled content."
Meanwhile, a lone developer claims to have created an actually original memecoin concept, but nobody noticed because it didn't have a dog, frog, or surprised guy pointing at chart in its logo.
At press time, someone had just tokenized this very article and launched $RECURSIVE_KEK, which immediately hit a $50M market cap because of course it did.
About the Author: Kobayashi Mememoto is an independent journalist with years of experience at the intersection of memes, crypto, and finance. Kobayashi's articles have been featured in several finance and crypto publications, with his main expertise being in memecoin trading. Mememoto's motto? "If you're not willing to lose it all on the next pump.fun jeet token, are you even investing?"
